All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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