yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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