Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
