I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
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