Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize