And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
