i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
