yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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