Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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