The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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