He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
