Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
