508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
