Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
