Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
