Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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