At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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