is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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