don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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