id be glad to
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
