pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize
