i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
