He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I woke up under a house in Key West
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