'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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