This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
