I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
