i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
This is the high leading the old right now
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
