in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
