PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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