my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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