I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
