I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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