i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
