And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
