WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
