Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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