Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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