I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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