i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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