Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
