OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
