Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
