i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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