the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
