You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
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