I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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