I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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