Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Randomize
