Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
