Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
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